Wednesday, November 20, 2024

How you pick the right thing to change - 70/30 rule

While going to board a flight, this book caught my attention and was a great read for a four hours flight.


What Got You Here Won’t Get You There by Marshall Goldsmith


 In a way, I can see why people have problems choosing what needs fixing. In golf, for example, it is common wisdom that 70 percent of all shots take place within 100 yards of the pin. It’s called the short game, and it involves pitching, chipping, hitting out of sand traps, and putting. If you want to lower your score, focus on fixing your short game; it represents at least 70 percent of your score. Yet if you go to a golf course you’ll see very few people practicing their short game. They’re all at the driving range trying to hit their oversized drivers as far as they can. Statistically, it doesn’t make sense because over the course of 18 holes, they’ll only need their drivers fourteen times (at most) whereas they’ll pull out their short irons and putters at least 50 times. Athletically it doesn’t make sense either. The short game demands compact delicate small-muscle movements; it is much easier to master than the violent big-muscle movements of driving off the tee. Nor does it make sense competitively. 

Actually, the whole book is a great read to improve oneself.

Saturday, November 16, 2024

Empty!!

Last summer, I took a solo train journey across Central Europe. I shut off my work phone and used my personal cell phone just for travel needs. I decided not to communicate with anyone for 10 days and purely indulge in travel. It was a meditation and pilgrimage to my inner. 

 One evening, while roaming Salzburg, Austria, as I came out of Mozart's home, I noticed this marvel at one corner of the city.


 

Sunday, November 10, 2024

What will men never get about women?

 What will men never get about women?

(someone posted on Quora)

Until high school, I thought the most beautiful girls always preferred the stud—a handsome guy with great hair and a fit body, the one with blue eyes, the kind you see in teenage movies.

Then, my reality started to crack.

I saw hot girls with odd-looking guys. Strange-looking guys. Men with outdated sense of fashion, if any. Men who needed to see the barber quickly.

“What the hell is going on?”

Society teaches us money and looks get you ass. And in a way, they are. But having those things does not guarantee success with women.

You can look fit and fresh, have a good job or run your business, be well-spoken, and still not get the girl. Reality is too dynamic and unexpected to be bound by rules.

Your attitude, confidence, and approach to life matter much more.

When you’re happy, everybody wants a piece of that happiness.

In the past ten years, I have met all sorts of men. The ones who “made it” with women were guys who had a life and were happy about it. Guys who had good intentions for the people around them.

They weren’t caught up with the latest pickup technique.

They shared their good vibe. The laughs and humor. The sense of comfort and calmness around them. And they kicked ass.

Saturday, November 02, 2024

Iqbal on uinverse

  اقبال ۔۔

‏اس کھیل میں تعیینِ مراتب ہے ضروری
‏شاطر کی عنایت سے تو فرزیں، میں پیادہ
‏بیچارہ پیادہ تو ہے اک مہرۂ ناچیز
‏فرزیں سے بھی پوشیدہ ہے شاطر کا ارادہ

Wednesday, October 30, 2024

Ustad says!! (Qamar Jalalvi)

 بے وجہ خَم نہیں ہے کمر میں میری قمر

میں جُھک کے ڈُھونڈتا ہُوں جوانی گئی کِدھر 

Tuesday, October 22, 2024

A bus driver

(Shared by a friend)

I was stuck on a crosstown bus some years ago in New York City during rush hour. Traffic was barely moving, and the bus was filled with cold, tired people who were deeply irritated with one another and with the world itself. 


Two men barked at each other about a shove that might or might not have been intentional. A pregnant woman got on, and nobody offered her a seat. Rage was in the air; no mercy would be found here.

But as the bus approached Seventh Avenue, the driver got on the intercom.

"Folks," he said, "I know you have had a rough day and are frustrated. I can’t do anything about the weather or traffic, but here is what I can do. 

As each of you gets off the bus, I will reach out my hand to you. As you walk by, drop your troubles into the palm of my hand, okay? 

Don’t take your problems home to your families tonight; just leave them with me. My route goes right by the Hudson River, and when I drive by there later, I will open the window and throw your troubles in the water."

It was as if a spell had lifted. Everyone burst out laughing. Faces gleamed with surprised delight. People pretending not to notice each other’s existence for the past hour were suddenly grinning at each other. Is this guy serious?

Oh, he was serious!

At the next stop, just as promised, the driver reached out his hand, palm up, and waited. One by one, all the exiting commuters placed their hand just above his and mimed the gesture of dropping something into his palm. 

Some people laughed, some teared up, but everyone did it. The driver repeated the same lovely ritual all the way to the river.

We live in a hard world, my friends. 

Sometimes, being a human being is extra difficult. You sometimes have a bad day, and sometimes, it lasts for several years. 

You struggle and fail. You lose jobs, money, friends, faith, and love. You witness horrible events unfolding in the news and become fearful and withdrawn. 

But what if you are the light? What if you are the very agent of illumination that a dark situation begs for?.

 This bus driver taught me that anyone can be the light at any moment. This guy wasn’t some big power player. He wasn’t a spiritual leader. He wasn’t some media-savvy influencer. 

He was a bus driver, one of society’s most invisible workers. But he possessed real power and used it beautifully for our benefit.

"No matter who you are, where you are, or how mundane or tough your situation may seem, you can illuminate your world. In fact, this is the only way the world will ever be illuminated, one bright act of grace at a time, all the way to the river.

Wednesday, October 16, 2024

Cassie

Cassie was my patient. Cassie died after a year in hospice.

I was holding her hands when she breathed last. This is the moment I crave to have but pray not to have!! - as it is incredibly overwhelming.

I have been to such moments when my Nana, dadi, and father died.

But Cassie was young.

As I held Cassie's hand, she opened her eyes and looked at me but decided not to say a word. I neither had the courage nor knew what to say.

I have always wondered about the last few words in Tolostoy's "The Death of Ivan Ilyich."


He wanted to say that but was unable to bring it out. 
"Anyhow, why speak? I must act," he thought.


I guess it's better to avoid talking to have a peaceful death.

Thursday, October 10, 2024

Lahore vs Karachi

 On ongoing teasing between Lahore and Karachi

گو لہور میں ولادت اپنی جگہہ اہم ہے

 مگر کراچی میں زندگی “جینے” کا اپنا لطف ہے