Tuesday, August 01, 2017

the dark tree, the cold sea

(someone shared with me as his close sibling stopped talking to him years ago and still not talking)

although I know you can never be found
although I know that from the highest height
you cannot be seen you are not hiding
from me or are you is it how you look now
or maybe how I look now all these years gone by
places seen people met not knowing at any time
who I was or how others saw me or did not see me
and how are you wherever you are if I write you a letter
I’ll get no answer if I cry out to you to come in my final
hour you will not come but I will still look for you

~ Emily Fragos 


mehnaz said...

One of the saddest things in life! Siblings share a lot more than DNA.
....I hope they reconcile someday!

Beyond said...

I think life moves on, one thinks it would stop hurting one day. The surprising factor is that it never does. It is one of the greatest trials one can face. One hopes constantly that something would change, something will change. This poem is eerily familiar unfortunately.

Anony said...

If somebody confided to me about it, I'd say (everybody knows it but one needs to be told nevertheless)::

If he has really done something wrong (which seems plausible as one doesn't cut sibling(s) off from one's life like that) then he really needs to send clear worded apology: "I am sorry about the way I have hurt you by my words/actions [mention of specific wrongs he said/did]. To this day I regret doing what I did at that day and I wish I could go back in time and change everything. I promise that I've changed for a better person and will never do that again!"

In apology letter, he needs to own up his actions and not try to "justify" it (i.e. not say something like "the job stress made me do that" or "I was not in right mindset at that time.")

Also forgiveness from others is a privilege not a right. Even if his sibling decides to not reply still -- with time -- his relative will find closure and he too will be able to forgive himself. In any case, it needs to be done and never under-estimate the power of sincere apology.

bsc said...

It reminds me of a poem of Ghalib who I think wrote after the death of his brother I remember two verses (will write roman Urdu)
Jatay hoay kehtay ho qiya mat ko milain gay
kia khoob qiyamat ka bhi ho ga koiee din awr
aisay to kharay na thay tum dad-o-sitad kay
kerta malik-ul-maot taqaza koiee din awr

mystic said...

Uncle ::: Oh my God... That Ghalib verse is so heart touching. And send shiver through my spine. (I thought he wrote on the death of his son, but I may be wrong)

lazim tha k dekho mera rasta koi din aur
tanha gaye kyon ab raho tanha koi din aur

mit jayega sar, gar tera paththar na ghisega
hun dar pe tere nasiyafarsa koi din aur

aye ho kal aur aj hi kahte ho k jaun
mana k hamesha nahi acha koi din aur

jate hue kahte ho qayamat ko milenge
kya khub! qayamat ka hai goya koi din aur

han ae falak-e-pir, jawan tha abhi arif
kya tera bigarta jo na marta koi din aur

tum mah-e-shab-e-charduhum the mere ghar k
phir kyon na raha ghar ka wo naqsha koi din aur

tum kaun se aise the khare dad-o-sitad k
karta malikulmaut taqaza koi din aur

mujhse tumhen nafrat sahi, nayyar se ladai
bachon ka bhi dekha na tamasha koi din aur

guzri na baharhal ya muddat khushi-nakhush
karna tha jawanmarg! guzara koi din aur

nadan ho jo kahte ho k kyon jite ho 'Ghalib'
qismat main hai marne ki tamanna koi din aur

mystic said...

Anony: My advice was same. Time heals many wounds (does it?)

Anony said...


Don't know, maybe it's easier said than done. :-(

Anony said...

Uncle & Mystic:

Sorry in advance for asking very basic question. Especially trying to read poetic verse via literal mind. But one might as well learn something from the blog :D

>> lazim tha k dekho mera rasta koi din aur
>> tanha gaye kyon ab raho tanha koi din aur

Is it Ghalib's deceased son/brother speaking to him in his thoughts?

>> aye ho kal aur aj hi kahte ho k jaun
>> mana k hamesha nahi acha koi din aur

I guess aana/jaana refers to the life and death of his relative. But second line refers to something else (maybe postponing stuff, in general) Yes??

>> jate hue kahte ho qayamat ko milenge, kya khub! qayamat ka hai goya koi din aur

Does he mean to say that everyday is a day of Qayamat (judgement)?

bsc said...

Mystic you are so right and thanks for correcting me. I read that poem in my high school (1948) and those memories are getting dim and dimmer every day
No Anony what Ghalib is saying that the day of mourning for the departed soul is so bad , it is itself like qiyamat (not uncommon in everyday language) for us.
You have not taken the first (Lazim tha..." ) verse fully either. Ghalib is "talking" to the departed soul (being his son he should have waited for) for a few more days. It is expression of a father why did you not take me with you-- kind of feeling Like Mystic says this poem is very heart touching. In fact there are no such poems like this even though there are hundreds of "Mersias" This is not regarded as mersia though some may categorize it as such

Anony said...

Thank you uncle for explaining the meaning in detail. Now it makes sense to me!!