Effortless

One Word - I learned in my life - which makes a distinct between a genius vs a regular person is "effortless".

Like in music few people can sing anything (no matter how difficult) so "effortlessly" like Kishore Kumar, Ahmad Rushdie, Mehdi Hasan and in west Beatles, Michael Jackson, Elvis and others. In acting, this moment I can think of Anil Kapoor in India and Sajid Hassan in Pakistan. If you watch them - their acting seems so natural, pleasant and completely effortless - like its just a way of life. Remember Jerry Sienfield? (what an effortless comedian). Similar is true for poets (famous episode of Ghalib when he recited whole bawazan ghazal in King's court), artists, cartoonists, scientists, surgeons, physicians and list goes on.

I don't know are they just gifted or they choose to do in life what they call "calling of their heart"?

Women & Pornography

Someone commented on my recent post, "Divorcing on 5th anniversary". The comment deserves a post, as it describes a dimension of women's psychology. I acknowledge I was not up to the mark when I missed adding this angle of disgust to pornography, at least from a girl's (Amina's) point of view - Thanks, Raheema! 

"Sir! you are dead wrong. Amina didn't get frustrated due to the lack of sex, but felt cheated, and felt that she couldn't provide enough for her husband. Women hate their men watching porno for reasons which you might not understand as a man. It's more emotional frustration than a physical one, as you tried to portray.... Raheema"

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Time out!

This is a common practice to give 'time out' to children if they don't behave, make mistakes or do something undesirable in the eyes of parents. This act of giving 'time out' is from the universal concept of "Reward & Punishment". Personally, I don't believe on idea of "time out". I think, it harms kid psychology more than helping their character. It tells them that making mistake is wrong. Psychologically, they get more prone to find escape rather than to stay and face adversaries of life. I think, it make them their all life to 'please' their parents. God forbid! if they get use to 'time out' (and don't get it) - parents may not be there to guide or save them.

Unfortunately, real life doesn't give "time out" - you deal with it!!

Nazeer Akbarabadi- 2

Man ! Leave greed and air, stop roaming place to place
Robber of ever (death) rob (everyone) with a bang day and night
What Bison, Buffalo, Bull, Chicken - nor big bucket will save bone
What Wheat, Rice, Provision, Pea - What Fire, Smoke and flame
Everything will lay astray - when traveller will take his road

Related previous Post: Nazeer Akbarabadi

DNR

During my residency I had to rotate for a month in Pediatrics. (Personally I always found pediatrics emotionally so overwhelming that I decided not to choose it as my career).

We had one 5 year old child in our service who survived the resuscitation efforts but became machine dependent due to severe anoxic encephelopathy. Child was often getting admitted from home due to different infections. During my rotation, our attending tried to speak to parents to make child DNR (Do Not Resuscitate) in case of any other catastrophy but parents had hard time making any such  decision. At that time, I was a young blood and full of logic. I could not comprehend the stupid stubbornness of parents.

Now when I am a father of 2 healthy kids - it always run shiver through my spine even thinking of being in such situation. Now I can completely understand the heart of those parents who once had that healthy smiling kid in their arms. Now I know, how hard it is to say goodbye to your own child and to sign that DNR papers.

Lawa

Jub Rahim Bhai - Sameena Bhabhi ke peeche churi (knife) le ker bhage to Sameena bhabhi ne 911 call ker di. Rahim Bhai aik raat jail main rahe. Uske baat abbu 'bail' kerwa ke hamare ghar le aaye magar poore khandan main Rahim bhai pe bari thu thu hui. Abbu ne bhi khub khari khari sunayi. Main wahiN betha sochta raha ke Rahim bhai jese miskeen shaks ne churi kese utha li?

Rahim bhai visa pe canada aaye the - Canada main rukne ke liye Sameena bhabhi se shadi ker li. Sameena bhabhi ne is baat ka khoob 'advantage' liye. Shadi ko 22 baras guzar gaye - 2 bachhe college paunch gaye magar Sameena bhabhi ka har dusre din ye taana khatam nahi huwa ke "Aaj canada main meri wajah se bethe ho werna karachi main jutiaN ragar rahe hote"

22 baras ka gubaar - lawa bun ker jo aik din nikla to sab kuch saath baha ke le giya. Rahim bhai ab Brampton main kahin akele rehte hain - aur har sham logon ko emails forward ker ke waqt katte hain.

KirnaiN

Urdu main mere kiya, kai logoN ke pasandeedah writer hain - Shafiqur-Rehman. Unki aik 'short story' hai "kirnain"........I think, it is one of the finest love story written in urdu literature.....

Us kahani ka aik jumla bohat sada hai magar zindagi main mujhe lagta hai is se ziyada sachhi baat shayed hi likhi gai ho: "Agar yahi hona tha to mere dil ki weerani ne pehle hi se kiun na bata diya"

Rishte aur Security

Shazo ne bikul theek kaha tha: "Jis rishte se security bhi na mile - there is no point in such bloody relationship"

realization

Nahi nahi!

Koi pagal nahi
Sab pagal hain
Kuch log pagal hain
Tum pagal ho

Bulke shayed

Sirf main pagal hun!

Working on Marriage

(The following post is controversial, and you have all right to disagree)

There is no such thing as "working on marriage." Marriages either work or don't work. But working on marriage is the rationalization of the fact that you are in a noncompatible relationship. There may be another thing - acceptance of your given circumstances. But no, Sir! Marriage doesn't get better by working on it! - it just survives.

Personalities are like blood groups -
if they don't match, they just don't match.