RIP Robin Williams

One fine artist and man, Robin Williams died. One lesson which I learned and tried to teach many youngsters around me is the following scene from 'Dead Poets Society".

(See the youtube clip below and try yourself standing on table and look around the room)

I stand upon my desk to remind myself that we must constantly look at things in a different way. You see, the world looks very different from up here. You don't believe me? Come see for yourself. Come on. Come on! Just when you think you know something, you have to look at it in another way. Even though it may seem silly or wrong, you must try! Now, when you read, don't just consider what the author thinks. Consider what you think. Boys, you must strive to find your own voice. Because the longer you wait to begin, the less likely you are to find it at all. Thoreau said, "Most men lead lives of quiet desperation." Don't be resigned to that. Break out! Don't just walk off the edge like lemmings. Look around you. There! There you go. Yes! Dare to strike out and find new ground.

Maryam Apa

Meri umar shayed 10 baras ki thi, jab Maryam apa biha' ker hamarey mohalle main aain. Jab pehli baar main ne Maryam apa ko dekha to dekhta hi reh gaya. Is qadar khubsurat chehra! Main ne Maryam Apa se kaha: "Aap bilkul us Shehzadi jesi hain, jinhe Kohkahaf ka jin utha ke le gaya tha". Meri baat sun ker woh hans di aur mera gaal thap-thapa diya, magar aankhoN main aansuoN ki aik halki si lakeer teyr gai, aur main sochta raha: meri baat per Apa rone kiun lagi.

 ....Aur phir kuch arse baad Maryam apa hamara mohalla chor gain. Magar unka khubsurat chehra hamesah mere saath raha. Jahan Shehzadi ki koi kahani parhi, Maryam apa yaad aa gain.

Phir main America aa gaya. Aahista Ahista un ki yaad mehv ho gai. Barson beet gaye. Zindagi main phir aik mor aaya, jab main ne apne bachhon ko shehzadi aur Jin ki kahani sunana shuru ki. Maryam Apa ka khubsurat chehra phir aankoN main cha gaya.

Peechle December, aik shadi main Maryam apa ki bhanji mil gain. Main ne Maryam Apa ka haal poocha, to usne bataya: Maryam Apa ke saath bohat buri hui. Yake baad degre 6 bachhe paida kiye. Barson se shohar unhe maarta peetta hai, dande se kutai kerta hai - aur aksar ghar se nikal deta hai. Korangi ke kisi be-haal chote se mohalle main guzara ker rahi hain. Us ne apne phone pe tasveer dikhai to yaqeen nahi aaya, ye wahi Maryam apa hain. 35 baras main unho ne 100 baras ke safar tey kiya tha. Chehre pe jhuriaN ubhar aayi thiN. Un ki tasveeer dekh ker mujeh laga shayed hawa main 'oxygen' ki kami ho gai hai. Mera dum ghutne laga tha. Main taza hawa ke liye hotel se bahir aa gaya.

35 baras lag gaye mujeh ye baat samjhne main ke, jub main ne un se kaha ke: "Aap bilkul us Shehzadi jesi hain, jinhe Kohkahaf ka jin utha ke le gaya tha" - to kiun unki aankhoN main aansu ubhar aaye the!

Ye hamari kesi zindagiyaN hain, jahan koi shehzada nahi aata - aur kai Maryam ApaiN maut tak, be-haal mohalloN ke barzakh main jhulasti rehti hain!

An extended meaning of "Halal"

I have an interesting maulvi friend. He has one foot long beard. But comfortably, he can sit in a bar with all gora friends sipping orange juice, discussing cirrhosis. (Not to mention, once he tried to convince a stripper to consider hijab while taking a lap dance!)

Few days ago, we went to a restaurant. I ordered my favourite 'medium done rib eye steak". My maulvi friend informed me that in restaurants steaks taste very yummy because in farms they castrate bulls (cutting testicles), which make bulls chubby and end result is yummy steaks due to high fat. And then he made an interesting statement: "Halal does not only mean to eat an animal who is koshered with God's name but also include animals who are properly and rightfully reared and grazed before Qurbani".

Aur main sochta raha - is defination se kitne log Halal khate honge?

A little story of forever moment - 2

A week ago, I posted a little story of a friend (here). Since that day, I had in my head (rather iPad), one of the finest song written almost 40 years ago by Tasleem Fazli (I think) - and was made immortal by Mehdi Hasan Sahab.

I have my own share of  nostalgic forever moments like any other human - and - often wondered in the middle of the night.

Itna puchuN kahin, mil jaye jo woh parda-nasheeN

Main bhi aata hun tujhe yaad, kabhie ya ke nahin

3 wishes of Alexander the Great

Following story of Alexander may not have any authentic historical documentation but anecdotally attributed to him all over. This was my father's one of the most favourite story.

Alexander, after conquering many kingdoms, was returning home. On the way, he fell ill and it took him to his death bed. With death staring him in his face, he had to accept the fact that his sinking health would not permit Him to reach his distant homeland. So, the mighty conqueror called his generals and said, "I will depart from this world soon; I have three wishes, please carry them out without fail." 

With tears flowing down their cheeks, the generals agreed to abide by their king's last wishes. "My first desire is that," said Alexander, "My physicians alone must carry my coffin." After a pause, he continued, "Secondly, I desire that when my coffin is being carried to the grave, the path leading to the graveyard be strewn with gold, silver and precious stones which I have collected in my treasury. " The king felt exhausted after saying this. He took a minute's rest and continued. "My third and last wish is that both my hands be kept dangling out of my coffin." 

The people who had gathered there wondered at the king's strange wishes. Alexander's favourite general kissed his hand and pressed them to his heart. "O king, we assure you that your wishes will all be fulfilled, but tell us why do you make such strange wishes?" 

At this Alexander took a deep breath and said: "I would like the world to know of the three lessons I have just learnt. I want my physicians to carry my coffin because people should realize that no doctor can really cure anybody. They are powerless and cannot save a person from the clutches of death. So let not people take life for granted. The second wish of strewing gold, silver and other riches on the way to the graveyard is to tell people that not even a fraction of gold will come with me. I spent all my life earning riches but cannot take anything with me. Let people realize that it is a sheer waste of time to chase wealth. And about my third wish of having my hands dangling out of the coffin, I wish people to know that I came empty handed into this world and empty handed I go out of this world." 

 Soon he let death conquer him and breathed his last. . . .

5 options

Talking to a friend about different options for dealing with an unhappy relationship, we concluded that there are five options for an unhappy relationship.

1. Stay unhappy and in constant torment. (Should not be an option, as nobody deserves continuous unhappiness)

2. Accept it - as our parents' generation did with arranged marriages. 

3. Create a parallel life - with something else as the source of happiness like a hobby or a charity and ignore other person's nuisance.

4. Leave the relationship - often it's hard due to other factors involved like kids, religion, society, etc.

5. Commit suicide (I will never advise this to anyone)

On "Mir Taqi Mir"

Even Mirza Ghalib acknowledged Mir Taqi Mir as a bigger poet than him. Reason? He conveyed deepest emotions in simple language and in small baher. Following shyer of Mir Taqi Mir mesmerized me for days. What a beautiful way of conveying the haal of a lover. Not widely known but Mir Taqi Mir was a son of a sufi saint and his poetry was a disguise of Malamati Sufism - and was commonly sung by faqeers on Dilli's lanes.

Note - This shyr is controversial. This couplet has also been referred to a relatively unknown poet: MUNSHI ANWAR HUSAIN TASLEEM

A little Story (of a forever moment)

Har insaan ki zindagi main kuch lamhe aese hote hain, jo saari zindagi pe bhari hote hain - Kuch lamhe jo saari zindagi insaan ke saath saath chalte hain, jinhe shayed kabhi maut nahi aati..... Kabhi subah brush kerte, bus main charhte, purhajoom dawat main ya yunhi akele chai peete - aik dum se yun saamne aa khare hote hain, jese bus kal ki baat ho. Us lamhe ki wahi taazgi, wahi khusbu, wahi vibration ......Aese hi aik lamhe ki kahani

There was a time when there was a guy who I truly, deeply, madly loved. We were in a forest, no really, we were in a actual forest, somewhere deep. It was early night time. And I was sitting beside him and we were talking. I cannot tell you how lovely I felt at the time. I was in 2nd year in medical school. He was a year senior. And then it got really late and we lost the way back and he picked me up in his arms (difficult to believe but I was around 50 KG at that point in my life) and it was the most romantic thing ever. I literally felt I was like a feather. To this day, if someone passes by wearing the similar kind of perfume that guy used to wear, I stop in my tracks.  
Oh doctor, aatish tab jawaan tha.

Diamond(s)

Kehte hain Heera (Diamond) agar aurat ki ungli main ho to, jitna qeemti ho, utni hi aurat ki zindagi barh jaati hai - Aur - agar mard ki ungli main ho to, utni hi uski umar ghat jaati hai.

Shayed aesa is liye hai ke - aurat "heere" ke saroor main goom reh ker har gum bhool jaati hai - aur - mard is gum main ghul jaata hai, ke itne qeemti heere ki heefazat kis kis tarah karun!

Relax

Four Teachers

I always tell my kids, there are 4 teachers in life. Indeed, I was lucky to have all 4 in my life

1. Books
2. Travel
3. People (log)
4. Poverty

Read book everyday, even if its your wedding day. Travel if time and money permits, even a short day trip excursion to nearby places. Aur, insaan is kaainat ki sab se bari kitab hai. And I wish my kids get their share of days in life without a penny in pocket, scratching head to find a way out.

Running Water (Woman)

(I wish I knew the source)

Story of a Cherry tree

Once there was a large cherry tree next to a house. 

A little boy who lived in that house loved to come and play around it every day. He used to climb the tree , ate the Cherries, played around and took a nap under the shadow…He loved the tree and the tree loved to see him play. Time went by…The little boy grew, and he no longer played around the tree. 

One day, the boy came back to the tree with a sad look on his face. “Come and play with me,” the tree asked the boy. “I am no longer a kid, I don’t play around trees anymore.” The boy replied, “I want toys. I need money to buy them.” “Sorry, I don’t have money…but you can pick all my Cherries and sell them so you will have money.”     

The boy was so excited. He picked all the Cherries on the tree and left happily. The boy didn’t come back. The tree was sad. 

One day, the boy grown into a man returned. The tree was so excited. “Come and play with me,” the tree said. “I don’t have time to play. I have to work for my family. We need a house for shelter. Can you help me?” “Sorry, I don’t have a house, but you can chop off my branches to build your house.” So the man cut all the branches off the tree and left happily. The tree was glad to see him happy but the boy didn’t come back afterward. The tree was again lonely and sad. 

 One hot summer day, the man returned and the tree was delighted. “Come and play with me!” The tree said. “I am sad and getting old. I want to go sailing to relax myself. Can you give me a boat?” “Use my trunk to build your boat. You can sail far away and be happy.” So the man cut the tree trunk to make a boat. He went sailing and didn’t come back for a long time. 

 Finally, the man returned after he had been gone for so many years. “Sorry, my boy, but I don’t have anything for you anymore. No more Cherries to give you.” The tree said. “I don’t have teeth to bite,” the man replied. “No more trunk for you to climb on.” “I am too old for that now,” the man said. “I really can’t give you anything… the only thing left is my dying roots,” the tree said with sadness. “I don’t need much now, just a place to rest. I am tired after all these years,” the man replied. “Good! Old tree roots are the best place to lean on and rest. Come sit down with me and rest.” The boy sat down and the tree was glad and smiled. 

 The tree in the story represents our parents. When we are young, we love to play with them. When we grow up, we leave them and only come back when we need help. Parents sacrifice their lives for us.

On 'Mortality' & 'Simple Joys of Life'

Few days ago, someone asked me about mortality. Since that day, I wanted to share one finest thing, I ever read on mortality. Its from a well known American novel "Water for Elephants" authored by a Canadian, Sara Gruen. 

"I am ninety. Or ninety-three. One or the other. 

When you're five, you know your age down to the month. 

Even in your twenties you know how old you are. I'm twenty three, you say, or maybe twenty-seven. But then in your thirties something strange starts to happen. It's a mere hiccup at first, an instant of hesitation. How old are you? Oh, I'm-you start confidently, but then you stop. You were going to say thirty-three, but you're not. You're thirty-five. And then you're bothered, because you wonder if this is the beginning of the end. It is, of course, but it's decades before you admit it".

and

"Sometimes I think that if I had to choose between an ear of corn or making love to a woman, I'd choose the corn. Not that I wouldn't love to have a final roll in the hay-I am a man yet, and some things never die-but the thought of those sweet kernels bursting between my teeth sure sets my mouth to watering. It's fantasy, I know that. Neither will happen. I just like to weigh the options, as though I were standing in front of Solomon: a final roll in the hay or an ear of corn. What a wonderful dilemma. ...."

On "Caller ID"

2 months ago, I decided to go bare on my home landline features (get rid of all features including caller ID). For a while, I felt like back in 1980s, when home phones were way of life without caller IDs. Where ring of phone in house will turn every head in house with an emotion of curiosity, anticipation and I guess little tachycardia of unknown! (My parents always believed and taught me of picking up phone if we are there).

I realized, how precious is that feeling of unknown expectation, excitement and suspense - and more importantly for human bonding, as people hear you in your voice!

Indeed, technology beyond certain limit is a curse and come with its own price.

Insaan Aur Gadha

Pakistani film star Kamal ko Pakistan ka Raj Kapoor kaha jaata hai, is liye ke un ki shakal aur andaaz Raj Kapoor  se milta tha - magar Pakistan jese bad-naseeb mulk main ye baat bohat kum logoN ne 'appreciate' ki ke Kamal sahab ne Pakistan main 'art films' banane ke 'risky' tajarbe kiye.

Meri umar shayed 7 baras ho gi, jab unki banaii hui film 'Insaan aur Gadha' release hui. Main ghar pe shikayat na ker dun, is dar se cousins mujeh bhi Sunday ka matinee show dikhane le gaye. Us film ne mujh pe bohat gehra asar chora. (since that film  - Film star Nisho remained my all time crush)

Film aik Gadhe (played by Rangeela) ke gird ghumti hai, jo logon ke zulm se taang aa ker khuda se dua kerta hai ke mujhe insaan bana de. Uski Dua qabool hoti hai. Woh insaan ban jaata hai. Magar insaan ban ker use jo tajarbaat hote hain, woh khuda se phir Dua kerta hai - "ya khuda mujeh phir gadha bana de!"

(Kehte hain, Bhutto sahab is film pe kaafi naraz huwe the - kiun ke aik scene main rangeela sahab bhutto ke andaaz main gadhoN ke jalse se khitab kerte hain)

Mujeh insaanoN ki is duniya  main, kabhi kabhi woh film bohat yaad aati hai

Aik French kahawat

Kabhi kahin kisi kitab main parha tha ke - France main aik baat kahi jaati hai:

"Duniya main saare masle tab shuru huwe, jab se aurat ne sex ka maza lena shuru kiya" *

Aksar apni thoRi khujate huwe sochta hun - shayed theek hi hai!

* Life's all problems originated since women start enjoying sex

On 'Forbidden Sin'

Today I had an interesting conversation with a friend about "Forbidden Sin". It reminded me of following poem of Fehmida Riyaz (read it loud to feel the actual depth of this poem)

A quote

(You may agree or may not! - I do)

“Religion is excellent stuff for keeping common people quiet. Religion is what keeps the poor from murdering the rich.” ― Napoleon

Con Artist

(Heard this story while at reading and book discussion of Dr. Mubarak Ali's Taareekh, Thug aur Daacu)

Main to 35 baras aik 'Con Artist' ki biwi rahi - magar khuda na kare kisi ghar main koi 'Con Artist' paida ho.  

Kuch log paida hi 'Con Artist' (Dhoke baaz / thag) hote hain. Ye unki sar-sasht main peenha (embedded in Genes) hota hai. Ye waqt aane pe ma-baap, bhai-bahen ya khud apne biwi bachhon ko bhi dhoka dene se nahi chugte. Inka pata tab chalta hai, jab ye aap ki zindai ka hissa bante hain. Ye jhoot bole bagair, logon ko 'cheat' kiye bagar zinda hi nahi reh sakte. Aik nafsiyati marz hai jo aas paas kai logon ko barbad ker deta hai.

Mere shohar ke paas kai 'shankhti card' aur darjano 'passport' the. Us ne Pakistan, Dubai, aur Europe main kai logoN ko chuna lagaya. Mere Ma-baap ke paas kafi daulat thi. Usne mere ghar waloN se jhoot bol ker mujh se shadi ki. Mere baap ki daulat hatyane ke baad us ne  'investment company' banayi - aur aik ke baad aik, kai logoN ko lootta gaya. Kabhi Dubai main construction ki jaali company banaii. Kabhi apne hi business main aag lagwa ker 'insurance' ko loota. Kabhi 'credit card' ko fraud kiya. Pakistan main aik hi makan 4/5 logon ko bech ker farar ho gaya... Khud apne bhai behno ko loot liya. 2 dafa pakra bhi gaya magar wahan se heart attack ka bahana ker ke hospital gaya aur doctor ka roop dhar ke farar ho gaya.

Woh saari zindagi bhagta raha. Mujeh aur hamare do bachhon se barson  dur raha.  Saalon guzar jaate, koi khabar na aati aur phir dheroN paise le ker namudar hota aur wese hi saari daulat le ker gaib ho jaata. ....Aakhri baar jaate mere saare zewar bulke bachhoN ke paise bhi le gaya. Ajeeb baat ye hai ke use na to bare makan main rehne ka shoq tha, na gaari ka, na kapron ka. Har cheez ko thori der 'enjoy' kerta aur phir chor deta.

Akhir kaar aik accident main maara gaya. Us ki mayyat pe na to koi roya na hi koi been hui. 

Main ne Karachi University se nafsiyaat main 'Masters' kiya tha. Main ne 'pathological liars' ke bare main to parha tha, magar 'pathological con artists' ke baare main nahi. 

Allah jane un ki is 'Mental Thrill' ke peeche kis nafsiyati mehroomi ka haat hota hai.