James and Colly

(You may appreciate this post - if you may have read John Steinbeck's "Of Mice and Men")

Main NY main tha. Residency ke chakkar main aik hospital main observership ker raha tha. Hospital, 90's ke Bronx ke aik 'dangerous neighborhood' main tha. Andhera hote hi hum apartments ke andar rehte the. Hamare paRos main do bhai rehte the - James aur Collins. Woh rural Texas ke rehne wale the.... Maalum nahi kaun chota tha kaun bara.

James se pehli mulaqat bhi ajeeb alam se hui...... Aik roz hum hospital se wapas aaye to hamare apartment main neighborhood ke kuch larkoN ne ghus ke qabza ker liya tha. Hume kuch samjh na aaya. Hum police ke chakkar main nahi parna chahte the. Hospital wapas gaye. Wahan woh 'cardiothoracic surgeon' nazar aaye, jin ke saath hum 'observership' ker rahe the. Hume phir hospital main dekha to bare hairan huwe. James usi hospital main janitor tha. Woh James se khub waqif the. Kehne lage, James se keh do. James ko dekhte hi woh sab larke rafu chakkar ho gaye...........James ka qad 6'2'' hoga. jism kisi pehlwan (wrestler) ki tarah muscular tha. Aik dafa apartment ki aik tenant ne mujh se kaha tha: "Main aurat hun, magar agar, mard hoti to bhi james se piyar ker leti"! James ka dimag bhi bohat garam tha. Aate hi us ne neighborhood ke 2/4 'gang members' ki khub pitaaii ker di thi aur apni dhaak bitha di thi. Texas se aaya tha, is liye 'guns' ka bhi bara collection saath laya tha.........Usse darne ki yahi wajah bohat thi...

Collins - barkhilaf dimagi aur jismani tor pe kamzor tha. aur majzoobi batain kerta rehta. James uska bohat khayal rakhta. Hum use 'Colly' kehte the.

Colly mujh se bara 'attach' ho gaya. Usi ki wajah se kai shamaiN unke apartment pe guzri.....Ye 1993 ki baat hai. Jab Colly ko main ne pehli baar bataya ke main Pakistan se aaya hun to us ne kaha: "Main tumhare mulk pe american jahaz uRte dekhta hun, aur unse dhamake hote hain... boom boom.." (Aaj bhi jab drone ki khabrain parta hun to Colly yaad aata hai). Aik din main ne use Pakistan ka naqsa dikhaya to, us ne 'Skardu' pe ungli rakh ke kaha: "yahan jahaz utare ga" (? !).............Colly dhol ki thaap (Drum beats) sun ker pagal ho jata tha.....Aik din hum use upstate NY, kisi Arab festival main le gaye. Keffiyeh sir pe bandh ke dhol ki thap pe khub nacha...baar baar mujhe se kehta: "I Muslim, I Muslim"!

Aur phir aik din Colly bohat bimar ho gaya. Shadeed pneumonia tha!. ICU main ventilator pe chala gaya. James bara pareshan rehne laga.... Udhar Colly ki oxygen requirement barhti jaati, idhar James ki nabz doobti jaati.. Unhi dinoN aik sham James ne mere pehlu pe sir rakha aur bachhoN ki tarah bilak bilak ke rone laga.. Kehne laga: "Apna koi jub itna bimar ho to zindagi main har cheez bulke khud zindagi be-mani ho jaati hai". Woh itna roya ke main dar gaya ke kahiN ise kuch na ho jaaye.

Aur phir aahista aahista Colly theek ho gaya. James NY ki sardioN se dilbardashta ho ker phir rural Texas chala gaya. Suna ke, agle baras Colly ko phir pneumonia huwa - aur woh mar gaya.  Khuda hi jaanta hai James pe kiya beeti ho gi.

Aaj bhi jab hospital main pnemonia se koi maut hoti hai to apne pehlu main James ka sir mehsoos hota hai - aur thori der ke liye zindagi be-maani si ho jaati hai... 

Allah jane! bagair Colly ke ab James kesa hoga?


Note: Yesterday I wrote this post and today went to see masala bollywood flick with my kids, 'Dhoom 3'. They had little bit similar concept. Also, reminded me of great Hollywood work 'Rain Man' (here)

A Quote (agree?)

I am not sure to agree or not? too liberal?

 'Only education worth giving to a child is, teach them how to read, rest is all brain washing'. 

A POUND OF BUTTER

There was a farmer who sold a pound of butter to the baker. One day the baker decided to weigh the butter to see if he was getting a pound and he found that he was not. This angered him and he took the farmer to court. The judge asked the farmer if he was using any measure. The farmer replied, amour Honor, I am primitive. I don't have a proper measure, but I do have a scale." The judge asked, "Then how do you weigh the butter?" The farmer replied "Your Honor, long before the baker started buying butter from me, I have been buying a pound loaf of bread from him. Every day when the baker brings the bread, I put it on the scale and give him the same weight in butter. If anyone is to be blamed, it is the baker." 

 Moral of the story? We get back in life what we give to others.

On 'Philosophy'

"The purpose of Philosophy is to teach us how to die" - Pluto

Ibne-Maryam

"YasU Maseeh ke aage mera sir is liye kham nahi hai - kiun ke woh khuda ka nabi tha, ya koi maujiza tha ya maujize kerta tha - bulke isliye hai ke - woh shaks zameen pe basne wale dusre insaanoN ke liye - us daur ke khudaoN ke haaton - Suli char gaya tha! - Main ye nahi ker sakta".

(My head is bowed in front of Jesus - not because - he was a God's prophet or he was a born miracle or he did miracles - but it is because - he went to Cross - on hands of ruthless rulers of time - for the sake of other common people who walked on land - And I can't do that!)

Merry Christmas!

Wife's dying wish - A Double Rainbow story

(An interesting story on CNN)

"When Jayne and David began dating, she asked David the story behind a rainbow photograph in his youngest son Max's room. 

"Brenda and Max's song was 'Over The Rainbow.' They sang it together all the time. The day Brenda died, she passed away at 7:07 a.m. We hadn't had rain for five weeks straight -- and out of the blue, a double rainbow, as bright as can be, stretched across the sky for miles. The local meteorologist said the rainbow was an anomaly since we hadn't had any rain. I knew it was Brenda." David recounts."

Read full story at http://www.cnn.com/2013/12/22/us/iowa-wife-dying-wish/index.html?hpt=hp_c2

3 Priorities

"The Best Man Holiday" (Trailer here) is a regular 'Saturday Date Night' type movie. But there was one interesting scene, where all the boys were talking and asking each other 3 top priorities in their life.

As one character put "Faith, Family and Football", his friend ask back: "Is this in line of order?" He hesitates for a second and replies: "I don't know".

Do you ever think of 3 top priorities in your life? Mine are "Honesty, Children and Career" - and they are in line! 

The Book Thief

Book Thief is an interesting movie and a must see for 2013 list. It is a story narrated by (angel of) death!

Story revolves around a pre-teen girl who goes through extreme hardship in Germany during World War 2. As she loses one after another of her loved ones, she questions the meaning of hope, life, help, promise, words, books and love. As angel of death says in the end - that - people think death haunts the life but in actuality its life which haunts the death that how hard and incredible to live through the process of life.

Movie has been done remarkably well with pace, photography, filming war and bombing, and showing era of 1940s. Trailer here

= Movie Homefront is a typical Sylvester stallone "All American One Man Hero" type movie. You will not regret $10 and will not get bored. Trailer here

Nelson Mandela - 2

Ye mid 1990s ki baat hai, jab Nelson Mandela South Africa ke President bane! 
Koi reporter unka Interview ker raha tha. 

Reporter: "Kiya aap ko itne baras jail main reh ker tanhai se ghabra ker kabhi kisi aurat ki qurbat ki zaroorat mehsoos hui?"

NM: "Aik dafa jail main, aik khubsurat Indian larki mera interview kerne aai thi - mera us se qurbat haasil kerne ka ji chaha tha"

Reporter (Kuredte huwe): "Aap ne kuch kiya?"

NM (Unke lehje main 27 baras ki riyazat kaatne wale shaks ka sufiana sukoon tha): "Nahi! aesa kuch nahi huwa magar main ne apne us khayal ko jhatkne nahi diya"!

Reporter: "Ye to bari ajeeb si baat hai ke aap us khayal se lage rahe. Aap kiya soch rahe the?"

NM: "Main soch raha tha - aakhir aesi kiya baat hui ke mere dil main is qadar darauwna khayal aaya"

Reporter: "Phir?"

NM: "Phir - mujeh mere hi sawal se mera jawab mil gaya - ke - jis lamhe insaan ki hissiyat pe uski jibli khawishain haawi hona shuru ho jain, wahin se uske dar ka safar shuru ho jaata hai!"

Naam se Wabasta

"Main bohat choti si thi, tab se mujeh aik khawab aata tha!

Aik  takhti hai, us pe aik naam 'afzal' likha hai. Phir woh naam mit jaata hai aur koi 'anwar' likh deta hai. 

Phir meri shadi 'Afzal' naam ke shaks se ho gai. Afzal bohat achha insaan tha magar mujhe usse kabhi mohabbat na hui. ...Aur ye khawab bhi band na huwa! Phir meri zindagi main 'Anwar" naam ka shaks aaya. Main us ki muhabbat main aesi giraftar hui ke apna sab kuch chor char ker ghar se bhag gai. Anwar koi bohat achha insaan nahi nikla. Sharab bhi peeta hai. Juwa bhi khelta hai. AurtoN ka bhi shoq rakhta hai. Ji main aaye to mujhe marta peetta bhi hai. Magar Khuda jhoot na bulwaye - agar mauj main aaye to toot ker piyar bhi kerta hai, jo maango hazir ker deta hai. Main 'Anwar' ke sahar se kabhi na nikal saki. Bus lagta hai meri zaat ke saare zarre isi aik naam se wabasta hain.

Sach sach batao, kiya tumhari zindagi main aesa koi naam nahi hai jis se tum khud ko wabista samjhte ho?"

(Main ne dil main kaha): "Hai to! magar mujh main tum jitna hosla nahi hai"

RIP Nelson Mandela

From Faiz' - Nisar main teri galiyon ke aye watan (here in Zia Mohiuddin legendary voice)

Wajah

Koi to wajah rahi hogi - ke woh shaks apna sab kuch chor ker - yunhi ghar se nikal gaya!

On 'ilme najoom"

(I am making following post for my own record)

Bano Qudsia was born in Feroz Pur, India. It is said that when she was born, there was a hindu jotish (palmist) sitting outside the hospital. He predicted that this moment a 'bhagat' (god's person) is borned.  Later, she became one of the finest author of Urdu literature and over time her writings were bridge towards sufism and spiritualism.

Dye and High Heel

Us mard ka kabhi aitabar na karna jo khizab lagata ho ya oonchi aerhi ke joote pehnta ho

(Never trust a man who Dye his hair or use high heels for shoes)

 - Ardeshir Cowasjee

A rare Jaun Elia's talk (on Urdu and Shia rituals)

Jaun Elia remained a very volatile and controversial figure in Pakistan's modern literary history due to his unconventional thoughts, poetry and courage to speak loudly his thoughts.

Following is a very rare - albeit controversial talk - on Urdu and some rituals of Shia sect (He himself belong to a very reputed literary Shia family). Speech contains urdu curse words (C****, BC etc.) It tells us how Shia and Sunni sects lived peacefully in India just in recent past!

Personally, I met him twice. First, when I went to a small library/literary center in Garden east, Karachi looking for a book on Hasan bin Sabah. He helped me out and I didn't know this is Joan Elia. He worked there as a scholar. Second time, I saw him in a mushaira in Karachi. He was literally and physically thrown out of National stadium when he start talking against MQM!

Note: His full name was Jaun Asghar Elia. Why he was named Jaun by his father and what it means, I don't know. But Elia was his faher's tkhallus and he adopted same.

Enjoy:    http://www.kidvai.com/windmills/Media/JoT.mp3

Rumi

Rumi's poetry has consistent themes from different angles including "love for all including sinners even murderers", - and - '"Learning the secrets of the universe through silence". 

 But one theme which always remained stuck to my brain and I found consistently true in my life is - "What you seek is seeking you"

Green Card

Mujeh ye bhi to yaad hai ke - Jab main New York main tha aur woh mere saath thiN - aur main ne aik din hanste huwe unhe kaha tha ....... "Ammi main soch raha hun ke yahiN shadi ker lun, achha hai na Green Card bhi mil jaaye ga"..... To Ammi ne mujeh muskura ker kaha tha: "Achha! ye halaat hain? Beta jo log zindagi main kamyabi ke liye chote chote raaste akhtiyar kerte hain, woh amuman chote faasle hi tay ker paate haiN. Tum khud ki qabliyat pe bharosa kiun nahi kerte"......


(From Baland Iqbal's short story 'Ya Bibi Sayyada'. Baland Iqbal is a physician, writer, journalist and TV anchor. He resides in Toronto. He is son of Himayat Ali Shayer. He recently published his short stories - "Meri Ikyawan KhaniyaN")

Man's Ego

(One of my friend frequently flirt with writing TV dramas. He wrote something very interesting)

"Mard ki anaa hi uski sab se bari taqat aur uski sab se bari kamzori hoti hai"!

(man's ego is his biggest strength as well his weakness)

A thought

I seldom share forwarded stuff from emails, FB etc. But I am sharing following, as it has a little different angle in its thought which struck me. Kind of a girly thing but....

Knowledge, Intelligence and Wisdom

Human intellect is comprised of 3 levels

1. Knowledge - to know various aspects of a subject
2. Intelligence - Ability to drive a conclusion from that knowledge
3. Wisdom - To know what to to do with that conclusion

(In Urdu you may call it Ilm, aqalmandi aur Danish)

Gulab Jamun

Jab hum college main the to hamare aik ustad kehte the: "Insaan ki zindagi main aik mithai aesi honi chahiye jis pe aap ka bure se bure tareen halaat main bhi dil aa jaaye aur aap ko, us ko khane ki tamanna ho. Jab tak aesa hai, samjhaiye aap main zindagi ki ramaq baqi hai"

I can say this "yes" to Gulab Jamun. Do you have any?

Diwali (and RIP)

Few bloggers continue to amaze me with their wisdom (mind it: wisdom is different from intelligence)

Rohit from Mumbai again strike me with a beautiful post on Diwali:

"On Diwali, when I was a kid, Maa would ask me to keep my door and windows open as I sleep. She would say, “We should not miss any chance if Lakshmi plans to walk into our house.” Well I don’t really know if Lakshmi ever walked into my room in last so many Diwali nights. In fact I don’t even know or care if she exists. But what has remained with me is the idea of open doors and windows. Today, as people around me prepare for the festival once again, I wonder what are we gonna open ourselves to?.........As I retrospect today, I realize, besides everything else that could or could not, what certainly has walked into my life is a sense of wonder.... With each person around us, there’s this amazing possibility of a whole new world… or a whole new understanding of our existing world."......Read whole post here (http://rohit05kumar.blogspot.com/2013/11/happy-diwali.html)


And, Adnan (Toronto) wrote: When we say "rest in peace," we're not speaking to the dead. We're speaking to ourselves." His blog link is here: http://blog.jaaduhai.com/

A note on 'Animal Farm'

First time I read George Orwell's 'Animal Farm' in intermediate as an assignment from our English teacher. That age of 16 was not very sweet as our heads were confused and angry over the modus operandi of this universe. We debated the book even outside the classroom on the beautiful lawn and stairs of National College, Karachi. We laughed, we vented, and we shook our heads. It was such a great work depicting the idiosyncrasy of both capitalism and communism. It was a commentary on the hidden evil nature of humans.

A week ago, I picked up that book again at O'hare airport. A smile came to my face. It brought back tons of memories. I reread it. I am more at peace with this world; I learned two lessons from that book.

1. In various roles and capacities in our lives - as a parent or as a teacher or as a spouse, brother, sister, friend, boss, etc., etc. - we have more or less some power over someone or something. If we don't keep our heads in check - we quickly start abusing our role. 'Animal Farm' teaches us how the human mind can easily and promptly succumb to power!

2. Humans, for their means, can stoop to any level, even if they have to trade, dine and wine with low-level savages and animals. In Urdu, let me convey my sentiments: Insaan bara Kamina hai. Ye apne matlab ke liye kisi bhi janwar ya shaitan se dosti ker sakta hai.

*

Note: It is a very small novel which you can finish quickly. Free link here

Mamta

"Shadi achi cheez hai, ker leni chahiye"
"Aur agar shadi kisi kamine aadmi se ho jaaye to?"

"To koshish kerni chahiye ke bachhe ho jaain"
"Ye kiya baat hui?"

"Baat to hui! Aurat ke andar Ma banne ka aur aulad ki parvarish kerne ka aik aesa janooni jazba hai, ke woh uske liye ziyada tar, kisi bhi kamine shohar ko bardasht ker leti hai"

4 Surah

"Tum na to khuda ko maante ho aur na kisi Allah wale ko! Har cheez ko psychiatry ki aankh se dekhte ho. Agar ye sab jhut hota to 15 saal main kahin kisi 'prozac', kisi 'paxil' ya kisi 'psychotherapy' se mere 'depression' ka ilaj ho hi jata! 

Magar mera ilaj huwa to korangi main bethe aik baba ki choti si dua se.

Yaad hai! - jab tum ne mujhe Banu Qudsiya ki kitab ka woh hissa park ker sunaya tha jis main likha tha - 'Insaan Ishqe-la-haasil se deewana huwa' - to main kitna bilak bilak ke roi thi.

Us din pehli baar main ne tumhe bataya ke Rehan ka ishq mujhe kha gaya. Jab Rehan mujhe chor ker chala gaya to main sach main deewani ho gai - Jitni 'medicines' ke naam tumhe nahi aate un se dugni dawaiaN main ne khai hain - Kai kai raataiN ro ro ker guzari....magar aik lamha chen nahi aaya. 

Peechle mahine Pakistan gai to bari apa mujhe korangi main aik baba ke paas le gain. Us ne bas sir pe haat pehra, paani ka aik piyala diya, us pe koi ayat parhi aur kaha pi jao. Phir raat ko sone se pehle 4 surahaiN parhne ki nasehat ki. Jis Quran ki ayatoN ka tum aksar mazaq urate ho, uski 4 surah tumhari saari psycho-pharmacy se ziyada taqatwar nikli...Us raat 15 baras main pehli baar khub ji bhar ker soi.

Sach poocho to har raat surah falaq, surah naas, sura ahad aur surah asar parh ker soti hun - aur itni gehri neend soti hun ke kabhi na soi thi.

Mere bablu!  Apne Allah se laraii chor do. Tumhari tarah main bhi  apne khuda se barsoN larti rahi, magar sukoon ki neend aakhir usi ki agosh main aai hai!"

Who and What

In life, it is more important to concentrate on "Who" instead of "What"!

It is more valuable to ask: "Who is important?" than "What is important?"
It is more worthed to ask: "Who is with me?" than "What is with me?"

(Heard in Jim Collins lecture, author of 'How the Mighty fall')

Faraq!

Zindagi main 2 tarah ke dostoN main faraq kerna bohat zaroori hai. 

Aik woh jo 'don't care'
Dusre woh jo 'don't know'

(sometime people care, they just don't know what's going on)

Baaz auqat hamare achhe dostoN ka ye haq hota hai ke woh jane ke humare saath kiya ho raha hai! 

Baqol Hazrat Ali: "Badnaseeb hai woh shaks jise dost na mile, aur us se bhi ziyada bad-naseeb hai woh shaks jo achhe dostoN ko kho de".

Universe Conspired

Peechli post Mirza Ghalib pe thi. Us pe aik baat yaad aai hai to likhta chalun, is se pehle ke bhool jaun. Ye zaroori baat hai.

Gulzar Sahab ka "Ghalib" TV serial 1988 main Indian TV se broadcast huwa magar is serial ko banane ka khayal pehli baar 1973 main aaya. Unka khayal tha ye role ya Amitabh Bachchan karain ya Sanjeev Kumar. Us waqt Naseeruddin Shah ko koi nahi janta tha. UnhoN ne Gulzar sahab ko khat likha ke mere siwa ye role koi nahi ker sakta. Gulzar sahab ko woh khat to kabhi nahi mila magar 15 saal baad Ghalib ka markazi kirdar Naseeruddin Shah hi ne perform kiya. 

Naseeruddin Shah ka kehna hai - "Universe conspired"

Qufale-Abjd (Combination lock)

Internet is an amazing thing. You meet different people. I found a relatively small urdu blog "Elementary" belongs to a person named "Kay" (here). He reminded me an old forgotten (for me) but one real classic ghazal of Mirza Ghalib, 

عشرتِ قطرہ ہے دریا میں فنا ہو جانا
درد کا حد سے گزرنا ہے دوا ہو جانا

Ishrate-qatra hai darya main fana ho jana, 
Dard ka had se guzarna hai dawa ho jana 

(pleasure of drop is to get dissolve in river, 
Once sorrow crosses the line, it becomes a remedy). 

The whole ghazal is pure Ghalib's classic but following verse is just out of world!

تجھ سے قسمت میں مری، صورتِ قفلِ ابجد
تھا لکھا بات کے بنتے ہی جدا ہو جانا

Tujh say qismat may mayri surate-qufale-abjad
Tha likha, baat kay buntay hi  juda ho jana

(Our relationship was alike combination lock, 
as soon numbers matched we were separated!)


*Sorry for ghulabi translation

A quote (Women)

"Women are made to be loved, not understood" - Oscar wilde

(My take on) Abraham's spooky story

(Following post is very unconventional and out of box and may insult your individual belief. Moreover, this is my personal conclusion with note that I am neither a very ritualistic muslim nor a vegetarian).


I think, I was in Grade 2 and 7 years old, when our teacher told us the story of Hazrat Ibrahim and significance of slaughtering of animals on Eid. And I said: "This does not make sense"! (ye to koi baat na hui") - I was punished!

Though all religions are full of mythical tales and are acceptable in context of message within it. But, for decades, I was unable to make peace with Ibrahim's story of taking his own son for slaughtering. It remained spookier than any other story, and a tale of schizophrenia - due to the fact that I got reminder every year on Eid. It took me to various explanations as all Abrahamic religions believed on this tale - either with mention of Ishmael or Isaac as his son. 

My conclusion, which may not coincide with your conventional belief, is following - and it is concluded from Quranic verses (37:75-108) - Which is whole second para/rukuh of said chapter/surah. You need to read the whole thing to get the meaning instead of just concentrating on one verse as conventionally people do (Ayat 102).

This whole chapter talk about prophets calling people to Monotheism (one God). And mention of perpetuating same calling in their generations. In same context All Mighty mention that Abraham asked his fellow citizens to stop praying to idols and called them to one unseen God. As they refused, he prayed for a son who believes on him. And God answered his prayer, gave him a son (no mention of name of son) - and as he grew and become an adult - Abraham mentioned to him his vision. He agreed and put his forehead down!

Stories aside but Quran doesn't mention Abraham even touching any knife. Also, Quran does not speak of any animal replacing his son. Conveniently forgotten is consent of his son while all emphasis go to Ibrahim's dream! My take is that Abraham called his son, as he became an adult, to believe on one unseen God, and he willingly submitted to his belief! I believe, "Zabah" referred to submitting him to One God and purifying him from idols - rather than in literary sense taking him to kill with knife. There is no mention of All Mighty suddenly asking him to sacrifice his son. It is all in context of vision of his callings to One God. Core is in words "Fallama aslama wa tallahu lil jabeen".

Addendum: In other parts of Quran, there is mention of sacrificing animals particularly in reference to Haj but at the end message is "It is neither their meat nor their blood that reaches Allah, but it is piety from you that reaches Him" (22:33-37)

I don't think, sacrificing animal on Eid day is obligated - It would be 100 times more Islamic to spend that money on helping someone. Koi bhi chota sa achha amal Eid ke din Qurbani ki yaad dilane ko kafi hai

Asghar ka Makan!

Asghar ka makan school ke saath tha. Woh ahle-tashee (shia) the. Muharram ka mahina aate hi Asghar ka school main mazaq banna shuru ho jata. Hum sab na-samjh the. Us ko galeez namoN se pukarte. Zor zor se sab mil ker matam ka mazaq urate. Line bana ker school ke corridor main nikalte aur gaate jaate "Ya Hussain hum na the, Haleem khane main kum na the". .....Asghar chup rehta. Aik din kisi ne kaha: "Abe kuch to bol", to us ne jawab diya: "Karbala se jise sabar ki matti naseeb na hui woh abhi shia nahi huwa" (ye baat mujeh barsoN baad samajh aayi). 

Aathween, naween aur dasween (8th, 9th and 10th)  Muharrum ko Asghar ke makan per woh matam sajta ke Allah ki panah! Hamare abba matam dekhne ko mayub samjhte the magar hum phir bhi jaate, sharbat peete aur matam dekhte. ZanjeeroN ki jhankar,  lal dahakte koiloN ki angaar aur zaar-o-qatar rone ki woh qayamat bapa hoti ke dil dahal jaata. Kabhi kabhi to itna dar lagta ke us raat neend na aati. Yun lagta ke koi hamare kaan main ro raha hai!

Phir school khatam huwa, hum ne purana mohalla chor diya. 1980s main jab Karachi main Shia Sunni fasadat huwe to pata laga balwaiiyoN ne Asghar ka makan jala diya. Main jala huwa makan dekhne gaya to mera to dil hi ruk gaya. Bohat arse woh makan yunhi para raha. Log kehte Muharram ki tin raaton main - jale makan se - noha-kanaii ki awazain aati hain. Phir kisi ne woh makan khareed liya. Allah jane Asghar wale kahan gaye?

Us Makan main kai makeen aaye magar wahan koi abad na ho saka. Har saal do saal pe makeen badal jaate. Mujeh ye baat pata lagi to main ne socha chal ker dekhna chahiye. Main ne apne dost Ejaz se kaha chalte hain..

Dasween Muharram ki raat thi. SarkaiN sunsaan thi. Hum purane mohalle main paunche to woh makan Gair-abad tha. Poore makan pe andhera chaya tha. SaRak ke barqi qumqume (street lights) bhi gul the. Andhere ki apni dahshat hoti hai. Makan ki deewarain choti thiN. Hum deewar phalang ker andhere makan main daakhil huwe. Abhi band darwaze ki taraf barhe hi the ke khirkioN se siskiOn ki awazain aa rahi thi. Phir yun laga jese kisi ne 'Zainab' keh ker pukara ho! Hum ne kaha ya Ilahi ye kiya majra hai? Darwaze pe bara sa taala laga tha. Hum andhere main deewar tatolte tatolte ghar ke peechle aangan ki taraf gaye to yun laga ghar ki deewaron se matam ki awazain aa rahi hai. Ejaz ne meri guddi dabochi aur bola - bhag yaar! Hum peechli deewar kud ke jo bhage to bazaar main aa ke dum liya!

Ho sakta hai, ye hamare andar ka dar, wahma ya waswase ki taqat ho - ya phir hamare nana ki baat theek thi ke:

"Logon ka rona hasna - unke aehsasat, jazbat, duain, aarzuain, khawab, khusbuaiN - sab kuch - rang chune ki tarah - makan ke dar-o-deewar main rach bas jaata hai. Kuch makan khub abad hote hain aur kuch makan apne andar kisi ko basne nahi dete."

Soul mate

I never bought the concept of a soul mate, though I subscribe to the notion of 'spiritual tribes or families' - 'Soul Mates' but not Soul mates!

It was the year 2005. I was at the transit lounge of Amsterdam when I accidentally met a Chinese guy who was born and raised in the West. As we both started talking to kill time, he told me that he was going to China because he had a dream in which he was told he had a soulmate in some far-flung town/village in China. According to him, he was given all the specifics and details in a dream. He is now curious and wants to go and check out by himself. I didn't believe him. I asked him to email me if it turned out to be true. He promised. Indeed, a month later, he sent me an email confirming his dream was all true. I didn't believe him even then, thinking what a bluff!

Four years later, when I was closing my email account for personal reasons, I came across his email again, and out of curiosity, I sent him an email inquiring about his well-being and whereabouts. He sends me his picture with his 'soul mate.' He had embraced the Buddhist religion and stayed back in China for good! He looked happy in the photo with his hands around his 'soul mate.' I was not sure whether to continue to treat his story as a bluff this time. I just closed the browser.

Allah Jane!

*

On Antipsychotics

(On a woman killed in Washington DC Here. Reportedly she was off her meds)

At the beginning of my career, I had many antagonisms toward antipsychotics, antidepressants, and other centrally-acting drugs. But over the years with experience, I found them to be essential life-saving drugs. I met many, many patients and people who would end up in psych facilities, spoiled their life (read the story of Mani here), committed suicide or have killed someone without these drugs. Depression, Bi-polarism, Schizophrenia, etc., are REAL things! People act and do bizarre things.

The most important part is to have a doctor/psychiatrist/shrink who can 'finely' manage these drugs and can keep side effects under control.

*

7 Best of Steven Wright

Steven Wright, - one finest American Comedian - His mind sees things differently than most of us do 

1. I woke up one morning, and all of my stuff had been stolen and replaced by exact duplicates!
2 - A conscience is what hurts when all your other parts feel so good.
3 - If you want the rainbow, you got to put up with the rain.
4 - When everything is coming your way, you're in the wrong lane.
5 - A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
6 - To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
7 - Everyone has a photographic memory; some just don't have film.

A note on Surah Taubah

Disclaimer: My primary interest is in study of humanism, psychology, parapsychology, metaphysics and new age subjects. My interest in reading Quran is due to the fact that I was born in a relatively religious family but have strong reservations against many beliefs of Islam. Following post is not an advocation of any particular practice of Islam but my understanding on one aspect of political Islam. To date, I consider myself 'agnostic'.

 Islam has been subject to allegation as a religion of sword, a lot on the basis of Ayat 5 of Surah Taubah. This is the only surah without Bismillah (Where there is a war, blessing does not count). I spend many hours in my younghood to study this allegation. My unbiased study actually came out a lot simpler than I thought. I took help (no internet on those days) mostly from Arabic dictionary to understand the meaning of words beside available books at Liaqat National Library, Karachi and later at Chicago Public Library.

 First para of Surah Tauba (Rukuh) set the tone and theme for whole surah. It can be summarize as follow. I will keep it very concise as there would be no end to write details. It would be very unfair and actually biased just to read Ayat 5. The whole para (Rukuh) needs to be read to understand the full reference to context.

 This is all about on notion of breaking down of an agreement between Muslims and Pagans (ayat 1). Advice is not to rush to fighting while keeping trust on Allah (Ayat 2-3). It also calls for respect to other party if they keep their promises (Ayat 4). Later fight is advocated with full intensity ONLY if they break their promises. Again, it has been instructed to stop fighting if they embrace Islam (ayat 5). But LAST AAYA (# 6) is the conclusion and major cushion. If other party accepts defeat, even though they don't embrace Islam and remains pagan, it has been instructed to protect them in hope that they may eventually would listen to God's message - and advice is to transport them to a peaceful and war free zone of their choice!

Shahi Mohalle se Saskatchewan tak!

Paida to main Lahore ke 'Shahi Mohalle' main hui thi. Shahi Mohalla kiun bolun 'Heera Mandi' hi keh lo! Main ne kis raat kis nutfe se janam liya, meri Ma ko nahi maalum tha - bus usne mere naam ke saath 'Malik' laga diya aur main 'R**** Malik' ban gai.

Meri Ma aik ajeeb aurat thi - aik taraf woh pesha kerne wali aurat thi - aur dusri taraf namaz roze ki paband. Ajeeb si baat thi.

Amma ke kai dost the - bulke yun kaho - kai yaar the. Unki badolat, Amma ko TV pe kaam mil gaya. Amma ne jab TV pe kaam kerna shuru kiya to use aehsaas huwa ke ye duniya bohat bari hai. Wahan Amma pe Canada se aane wala aik shaks aashiq ho gaya. Amma ne moqa ganimat jaana - usse se shadi ki - aur hum sab Canada aa gaye.

Amma ko dar tha ke bare Shahr main rahe to koi purana janne wala nikal aaye ga. Amma ki dua jo qabul hui thi - usne toba ker li thi. Hum sab Canada ke province Saskatchewan aa gaye. Main wahin, aik chote se town 'Prince Albert' main bari hui. Aik normal Canadian zindagi thi. Abhi high school main thi ke wahin Pakistan se University of Saskatchewan aane wale aik Pakistani se mohabbat aur shadi ho gai. Main high school drop-out ho gai. Magar kia maalum tha ke us shaks ko sirf Canadian residency chahiye thi. Ye bhi gawara tha. Main aik gherulu Pakistani larki ki tarah kaam bhi kerti, ghar bhi sambhalti. Phir meri do betian paida ho gai. Canadian citizenship milte hi mere shohar ne university chor di aur kaam bhi chor diya. Ghar ka saara baar mujh pe aa para. Do betioN ki wajah se talaq ka soch bhi nahi sakti thi. Ghar ke ikhrajat barhte gaye. Meri akeli job se guzara mushkil hota chala gaya. Kisi ne mashwara diya massage therapist ban jao. So yahan wahan se waqt aur paise nikal ker certification ker hi li aur aik massage center main job mil gai. 

Aik roz paise ki musalsal tangi se tang aa ker main ne 'handsome tip' ke liye aik client ko 'hand job' diya. Gunah aur sharam ke aehsas is qadar shadeed tha ke main dil main darud shariff ka wird ker rahi thi! Ahista ahista sab kuch lutana shuru ker diya! Har raat apne khuda se muafi maang ke soti aur har subah betioN ke chehre ki raunaq ke liye wahi kaam phir se kerne lagti! 

Sach poocho to Shahi Mohalla ho ya Saskatchewan! PaisoN ki asoodgi ke liye aurat ne mukhtalif roop main jism ka karobar kiya hai. Ye koi nai baat nahi! 

Magar aik baat bohat ajeeb hai - jo buraii hamain patal ki taraf dakhelti hai - wahi apne allah se qareeb bhi kerti hai. Amma ki saum-o-salat ki pabandi ki samjh ab aayi!

Jab bazari aurat apne Allah ke huzur khari hoti hai to riya-kaari se aari hoti hai. Apni saari aalaishaiN apne rab ke aage rakh ke haath bandh ke saza ke liye khari ho jaati hai - aur woh rahim har raat us ki khta bhaksh deta hai. ye to insaan hi hai - jo sangsaari ka pathar liye us ke peeche dorta rehta hai!

Tasveer

"Ye tumhari deewar pe kis aurat ki ye khubsurat 'portrait' (tasveer) lagi hai?"

"Ye us aurat ki tasveer hai jis se main ne kabhi piyar nahi kiya magar is ne apni hadoN se barh ker mujh se piyar kiya - Bus isi wastey - ke main itna to ker sakta hun"!

Jhagra

"Mard aurat main jhagra kiun rehta hai?"

"Mard chahta hai aurat use asani farham kare, aurat usse mohabbat ki taalib rehti hai - yahi 'disconnect' rehta hai"

"Phir jhagra kese khatam ho?"

"Jab tak mard aurat ko mustaqil mohabbat aur 'assurance' deta rehta hai aur aurat us ki zarooriyat ko asan kerti rehti hai, jhagra nahi hota - werna phir shuru ho jaata hai!"

A quote

If you don't read the newspaper you're uninformed, if you do read the newspaper you are misinformed. -- Mark Twain

Halala! (Re-marrying in Islam)

(Halala refers to an act - where woman has to sleep/marry with another man if she wants to go back to her ex husband)

For long time I looked for right answer on concept of "halala" in Islam. I read various translations of all related verses in Quran, listened various talks from various levels of scholars. Let me assure you, in Islam, a man and woman can divorce and re-marry (just do new Nikah) without any consequences 3 times. Also a single divorce requires a statue of 3 months!

"Halala" comes in play only, when same couple go through divorce in their lifetime 3 times - which I doubt ever happen. (Best described in Surah 2:228-232). How 'Halala' should be performed is another subject and a glorious way to box-hit TV dramas!

 - It was just a passing note on my understanding and reading of Quran - though for me it was just an academic exercise.

Dreaming of rubble

I am always interested in pathophysiology, para-psychology and mystical dimensions of dreams, as you may have seen many posts on this blog. Here one caught my eye from one man who in one way belongs to my intellectual tribe, fondly called NFP. He dissects his dream in an unusual manner!

"In the dream I’m in a plain t-shirt and jeans, looking (and feeling) like I used to in my 20s: Lean, agile and a swift walker; no ‘pot belly’ or that stoic post-40 calm. I often dream about my father, to whom I was very close. Perhaps my mind has yet to accept his passing away. Nevertheless, in the dream he drops me in a busy area full of traffic and shops, and where lots of construction work is taking place. I get off, and that is when I realise I am carrying a black knapsack. This is strange because I have always hated knapsacks. Even when I travel across Asian and European cities and walk for hours, I refuse to carry one. So I wonder what the knapsack symbolised in the dream? Some sort of a burden or a worrying thought, perhaps?............."

Read full article here http://www.dawn.com/news/1044595/dreaming-of-rubble

Ba ka Guldaan

Zindagi ka koi chota waqiya, kambakht-mara saari zindagi peecha nahi chorta! 
Is baat ko bhi aap mere bachpan ki 'insecurity' ka parto samjh lain! 

Mere paas hamesha aik 'pot' rehta hai - jis main har roz 'change' (khulle) jamaa hota hai!

Faheem Bhai ka qissa bohat pehle is blog pe likha tha (here). 
Ye un dinoN ki baat hai, jab hamare haalaat koi bohat achhe nahi the. 
Faheem bhai hamare parosi the aur un ke ghar bhi gurbat ka raaj tha. 

Faheem bhai ko jab Dubai main naukri mili to Faheem bhai ki ticket main 3000 rupe kam parte the. Faheem bhai ki amma ko sara mohalla piyar se "Ba" kehta tha. Ba chupke se kahin almari se aik purana guldaan utha laain. Guldan ko tora to andar se koi 3500 hazar rupe nikal aaye. Thore thore ker ke 'Ba' us guldaan main Allah jaane kab se paise jamaa ker rahi thiN. Faheem Bhai khushi se nachne lage aur aik sham Dubai chale gaye.

Ye aik chota sa waqiya tha magar haramzada dimag se chipak gaya. Hamara bura waqt guzar gaya. Allah ne zindagi ka raasta kushaada ker diya - magar - Ba ke us zambeeli guldaan ne peecha na chora. Aaj bhi khulle paisoN ko zaaya nahi kerta aur roz bacha ker ghar laata hun!

A quote

"Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens." - Jimi Hendrix

Ma!

Insaan chahey kitni hi umar ka ho jaaye, pareshani main aik baar, usey Ma zaroor yaad aati hai!

Aik choti si hikayat

Ek sufi har subah milne wale har insaan ko haath utha ker salam karte. Sab unke salam ka jawab muskura ker salam se dete. Lekin ek aadmi tha jo roz unhe gali deta tha. Ek bhale aadmi ne us sufi se pucha: "Aap ise phir bhi roz salam kyon karte ho? Woh to aap ko roz gaali deta hai". 

Sufi ne jawab diya: "Jab woh mere liye apni buri aadat nahi chorh sakta, to main uske liye apni acchi aadat kyon chorun?"

On "Housewarming Gift"

Norma works in our hospital's ER desk. Coincidently she lives in my neighborhood. Few years ago, when I bought a house, I invited her to just come over with her family. Indeed, she did. As a housewarming gift, she bought a plant! I look bewildered at her. she said: "My Grandma used to say that there is nothing better than a plant for new house. As plant grows everyday, your love and kinship for house grows".

My daughter regularly watered and trimmed the plant. This evening, I realized how integral this plant has become part of my everyday life as I go in and out of my house!

(Today I recalled my one very old post on Mali Baba! (here)

Ashfaq Ahmad's last words

I am writing this post for myself to remember something which is important to me. I have learned a good deal out of this. Personally, though I don't agree with Ashfaq sahab's lot of views but indeed his writings left deep mark on my psych. I strongly believe that if someone has not read his short story "Gadarya" (Shepard), has not touched Urdu literature at all! (here)

As per Banu Apa: "On the morning of September 7 (2004), Ashfaq sahab left us forever. Just before his last breath, as he saw me sad he said - Qudsia, ghabrana ya pareshan mat hona! jo kuch ho raha hai theek hi ho raha hai".

Hair and Spirituality!

(aaj bhi jab bimar hota hun to amma kehti hain baal katwa lo)

In Study of religions, you will find 2 trends when it comes to hair. One set of ritualists believe to shave their head fully like Thai monks. This comes from the belief that if you keep your head bald you divert your energy inward and channel it for spiritual enlightenment

OR they do believe to grow or never cut the hair, like our sikh community (I just love them). This comes from the belief that as you grow your hair, you spread the inner energy outward, and your communal power get strong with spiritual strength.

I found these 2 contrasting views very interesting.

You will be surprise to know that there is a website dedicated to history and mythology of hair http://thehistoryofthehairsworld.com/

A Gold Coin!

Aik aadmi ko uski Ma ne marte huwe aik sone ki ashrafi (a gold coin) di - aur kaha - jab tak ye tumhare paas rahe gi, samjho meri duaiN tumhare saath rahe gi......... Us aadmi se woh ashrafi kho gi.

Jab use aehsas huwa ke uski ashrafi kho gai hai - to woh rota dhota - aik sufi buzurg ke paas gaya aur apni bipta sunai. Woh buzurg use, darya kinare le gaye - aur kaha: " Jab tumhari Ma ne tumhe ye Ashrafi di, to tum jeb main daal ke bhool gaye. Phir nahane gaye to ye darya main gir gayi."

Buzurg ne darya main haat daala to aik machli aayi, uske mun main ashrafi thi. Sufi ne machli ke mun se ashrafi le ker us aadmi ko di. Woh bara khush huwa! .. Buzurg ne us shaks ke haat se ashrafi le ker phir darya main phenk di. Woh shaks bara hairan huwa!

Buzurg ne kaha: "Tumhe agar Ma ki duaoN ki qadar hoti to ye ashrafi sambhal ke rakhte. Tumhari liye ashrafi ke kho jaana hi ahsan hai - kiunke - zindagi main bohat si cheezain kho jaayaiN tab hi woh paas rehti haiN".

A Quote - Sakoon

Wasif Ali Wasif ko parhne wala bulke unko mursheed maanne wala aik bara tabqa hai. Suna hai ab to har saal bhawalpur main un ka urs bhi hone laga hai.

Main ne unko bus thora bohat hi parha. (Mujh jese na-maaqool ko kabhi 'Ibne-Safi' ke sahar se bahir aane ki taufeeq hi naseeb nahi hui). Wasif Ali Wasif ki aik baat bohat pehle parhi thi - mera khayal hai woh baat kafi zaroori hai

"Agar apne dil ka sukoon barhana chahte ho - to woh cheez baantna shuru ker do - jis cheez se tumhe sukoon milta hai"!

(Shayed isi liye main blog likhta hun)


Addendum: You can read his famous book "Dil, Darya Samandar" here

(link: http://iqbalcyberlibrary.net/Urdu-Books/969-416-206-024/p0001.php)

Sir Zaheer!

Peechli aik post "Old Textbooks" main Sir Zaheer ka zikar aaya tha!

Sir Zaheer Class 7 se class 10 main mere Maths ke teacher rahe. Unhon ne Karachi University se Maths main Masters kiya - aur saari zindagi sarkari school ke bachoN ko Maths parhane main guzar di. Maths se unhe ishq tha. Pehli baar zindagi main kisi ne bataya ke Maths ki equations zindagi ko balance kerne ka khel hai. Pehli baar kisi ne sikhaya ke Maths ke Theorem zindagi ka aesa gorakh dhandha hai ke - yun hota to kiya hota  - aur - wesa hota to kiya hota. Pehli baar laga, Maths koi subject nahi - bulke pehlioN ki kitab hai. BatoN BatoN main bari bari equations yun samjha jaaate ke, baayaiN haat ka khel lagta.

Jab Metric ke baat main ne 'pre-medical' liya to bohat 'shock' huwe. Mujeh apne ghar bulwaya. 2 room ka chota sa makan tha jis main biwi aur 3 bachhoN ke saath guzara ker rahe the. Kehne lage tum 'Physics' parho. Main ne kaha: 'Sir! is mulk main Physics, Maths, Chemistry ka koi scope nahi'. Woh mera tanz samjh gaye. Kuch na bole!

Magar unki naseehat yaad reh gai! Main ne Medicine ko 'profession' ki bajaye 'part of life' samjh ke practice kiya! Aaj bhi hospital jaata hun to medicine 'Job' nahi lagti - khud Zindagi lagti hai. Unhi ki badolat - aaj bhi nayi baat seekh ke maza aata hai. Har din hospital main aik naya din lagta hai.....

Jab Aamir Khan ki '3 idiots' aayi to 2 log bohat yaad aaye, Aik 'Ejaz' (here) or aik Sir Zaheer!

Below clip always reminds me of him

https://youtu.be/POV3fKmSVkg

Sleep Deprivation!

(A passing note on everyday life)

If being a physician (and I have been), you ask me to fix one thing in your life to stay healthy, wealthy and wise - I will advise you to fix your sleep problem, if you have any! Once your brain is sleep deprived, you make wrong choices in life and plunge into whirlpool of bad luck and undesirable consequences. Remember, you can't change people and circumstances - its your attitude which makes a difference - and, sleep deprivation/insomnia is the last thing you want! 

Being working in hospital for now almost 20 years, I have my own - or should I say - more than enough share of sleep deprivation. I frequently ask nurses, para-nursing staff, physicians, residents and clerical staff about their modus operandi to keep sleep habit healthy. Everyone found his own way  from pharmaceutical to non-pharmaceutical answer. It ranged from Benadryl, Tylenol PM to having nap in day or sex before going to bed.

Point is work on it! Only you can answer. Find out how much sleep you need and how to have peaceful sleep. - even if you have to ask your doctor to check out your engine or to write Lunesta, Ambien, Helcion or whatever for PRN use!

Childhood

Insaan apne bachpan ka aseer hai

(Man is slave of his childhood)

Aurat ke Ghar!

Mard ko saari zindagi yahi ibhaam rehta hai ke aurat shaadi ker ke uske ghar main aai hai - magar aurat ka dil saari zindagi wahiN maeke main rehta hai! 

Aurat saari zindagi (Banu Apa ke lafzoN main) yahi shikwa kerti rehti hai: "Kitne hi saal susraal main raho, kitne hi bachhe jano - kese kese kaaj sanwaro, koi apna nahi hota. Susraal main to shohar bhi apna nahi hota, dusroN ka gila kesa?...."

Ab to ye aurat per hai ke - soche to - uske 2 ghar hain  - aur soche to - uska koi ghar nahi....

The conference of the Birds! (Mantiq-ut-Tayr)

Peechli aik post (Zafar Sahab - an encounter with a sufi) main Fariddudin Attar ki kitab 'Manṭiq-uṭ-Ṭayr' ka zikar aaya tha. "Persian sufi poetry" ka ye Shahkar bhi kamal ka hai. Mujeh to english translation parhna para. 

Its a very interesting read with theme of wahadtul wajood.

30 birds decides to go and find the perfect bird called Simorgh. Its double meaning. Simorgh itself literary translates to 30 birds but also it is the name of the world's most beautiful bird.

Their destination is hurdled with seven rivers named

1. Talab (to crave), 
2. Eshq (unconditional Love), 
3. Marifat (understanding), 
4. Istighnah (to get detach/isolate), 
5. Tawheed (uniqueness of All mighty),
6. Hayrat (Surprise) and, 
7. Fana (Get dissolve in God)

This large transcript is marked by small sufi tales in between which really makes the whole work spicy.

At the end when these 30 birds reached their destination, they learned that actually they all together make Simorgh! This can be explained beautifully and precisely by Ghalib's couplet

hota hai nihaaN gard main sehra mere hote 
ghista hai jabeeN khak pe darya mere aage

Mohabbat

Mohabbat ke jazbe main payedarii ho na ho, magar gherayii bohat hai

(Love may not have eternity but it has immense integrity)

Life's dirt

One day a farmer's donkey fell down into a well. The animal cried piteously for hours as the farmer tried to figure out what to do. Finally, he decided the animal was old, and the well needed to be covered up anyway; it just wasn't worth it to retrieve the donkey. He invited all his neighbors to come over and help him. They all grabbed a shovel and began to shovel dirt into the well. At first, the donkey realized what was happening and cried horribly. Then, to everyone's amazement he quieted down.

A few shovel loads later, the farmer finally looked down the well. He was astonished at what he saw. With each shovel of dirt that hit his back, the donkey was doing something amazing. He would shake it off and take a step up. Pretty soon, everyone was amazed as the donkey stepped up over the edge of the well and happily trotted off!

MORAL :
Life is going to shovel dirt on you, all kinds of dirt. The trick to getting out of the well is to shake it off and take a step up. 

"Piyar Kerte Raho"

What a classic read by Zia Mohiuddin of Adeel Zaidi poem

Link: http://youtu.be/4pBhvUUFhB8

Blue Jasmine

Woody Allen's new movie "Blue Jasmine" is a sweet bitter taste of life! Woody Allen is a legend and the way he did this movie, speaks of his genius!

Plot of the movie revolves around a neurotically anxious woman who once enjoyed the status of high elite New York society and suddenly events throw her down to nothingness. She has to move to west coast (a touch in directorship of 2 extremes coasts!) to live with her relatively low socio-economic class sister (ginger), who works as a cashier in a grocery store!

Movie demonstrates to us that how easily material well being can make us blind to phoniness of relationships (Relationship of Jasmine and her husband). But side notes in movie are as interesting as the main theme, like sometime we get second chance in life but we blew that too with fear of not speaking truth (Jasmine breaking up with ambitious but gentle wanna be a congressman) - and - how sometime we can stray away from true love under craze/haze of a new found person (Ginger sleeping with a guy she met in a party) - and - how 2 people can make up again!!! (Ginger getting back with her guy).

It was very touchy when Ginger's ex-husband said to Jasmine: "Its not easy for some people to put everything behind and move on in life"!

You should read NY TImes review: Pride Stays, Even After the Fall (or here)

Its a movie you may like to see  : http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FER3C394aI8

Others: 

1. "JOBS" turned out to be an unimpressive work though Ashton Kutcher did a remarkable job playing Steve Jobs. 

2.  Shah Rukh's 'Chennai Express' is a pure fun flick - 'aik dam paisa wasool masala picture'.
3. Jennifer Aniston's "We are the Millers" is just waste of time and money! I don't think, it was even funny

3 KahawataiN

1. Dunya pas-e-marg-e-maa, cheh darya wa cheh sarab 
(Once I am dead, Would it even matter if the world is a river or a mirage?)

2. Khuda ya to de ke aazmata hai, ya phir le ke aazmata hai!
(All mighty tests either by giving to us or by taking from us)

3. Insaan ki sachchai - uska hamsaya, hamsafar, ya uske saath karobar kerne wala hi jaanta hai
(Human's true character is only known by his neighbor, co-traveller or a business partner)

On "Used Textbooks"

There was a time in my life, when my parents didn't have enough money. We used to get one uniform and one shoes per year. We used to borrow used textbooks from friends in upper class by exchanging it with their siblings in lower class.

It was in 7th class when one day while having a math test, Sir Zaheer asked us to use reference formula from the back of the book. I failed as reference page for formulae was missing from my book.

That day Sir Zaheer said: "Son! Never get 'used textbooks'. I understand it costs money but it is not a good habit for 3 reasons. First, it may be outdated. Second, it may have missing pages but lastly and most importantly, it may take away your psychological craving of conquering new book as old textbooks do not carry the charm, smell and curiosity of hidden treasure".

I never believed that - but now I do. As someone told me once: "Fortunate is the man who holds a virgin woman, built his own house and smells pages of a new book".

Poverty Sucks!

Rishtey!

"Jab rishton main ye sawal aane shuru ho jaayaiN ke mera kiya faida? - to behtar hai woh rishta na banay! - kiunke rishtoN main to kabhi kisi ka faida nahi hota. Har koi aik aag main jalta hai - magar phir bhi ham rishtoN ka tana-bana is liye bunte hain - kiun ke hamari ruhoN ka khameer inhi rishtoN se gondha gaya hai".

Anguthi

"To jab Larki ne tumhe anguthi wapas ki to tum ne kiya kiya?"

"Rakh to sakta nahi tha, kisi aur ko bhi nahi de sakta tha.......Pehle socha phenk dun - phir McDonald ke aik 'charity box' main daal di"!

Lubna

(Following post carry some sexual content. Please leave if it bothers you)

(Recently while cleaning my old papers, I recovered a Birthday card)


Zindagi main kuch log bohat thore arse ke liye milte hain magar gehre naqoosh chor jaate hain.

Lubna se mera 'interaction' ba-mushkil 3 ya 4 mahine raha hoga. Ye 2006 ki baat hai. Tab woh Minnesota main hoti thi. Ab woh kahan hai - iska mujhe ilm nahi.

Woh mujhe pehli baar internet pe kisi Urdu literature forum pe mili thi. Usi ki hawale se main ne pehli baar naye shayeroN ko parhna shuru kiya - jin main Wasi Shah, Basheer Badar aur Farhat Abbas Shah qabile-zikar the. Usne mujhe in shayeroN ki kai nazmain email ki (jo ab bhi mere paas mehfooz hain)

Phir hamari messenger pe chat hone lagi. Jab use yaqeen ho gaya ke main aik normal aadmi hun to usse meri phone pe bhi baat hone lagi.

Lubna 3 saal pehle student visa pe Pakistan se aayi thi. Yahan bhai ke saath rehti thi.

Jab pehli baar main ne Lubna se kaha ke main use 'cam' pe dekhna chahta hun to usne inkaar ker diya. Usne kaha: "Main bohat badsurat larki hun. Meri umar 28 saal ho gai hai, magar aaj tak kisi mard ne mujeh pe nazar nahi daali. Tarah tarah ke namoN se pukari jaati hun. Pakistan main Koi 'kaali moti bhens' kehta tha. Koi 'atom bomb' kehta tha. Aur yahan bhi angrezi ke achhe achhe khitab milte hain".

Magar mere israr kerne pe us ne apna 'cam' on ker diya. Lubna khubsurat na ho - magar bilkul badsurat bhi nahi thi. Main ne use yaqeen dilya ke: "She is fine"! Mere 'encouraging remarks' se usko kafi dharas mili - aur woh mere se kaafi qareeb ho gai, aur kuch dinoN main hamari kafi 'frank friendship' ho gai!

Aik din raat ke 2 baje 'chat' itni frank ho gai - ke - 'we start talking about sex'. Mujhe uske kai sawaloN pe bari hansi bhi aai ke uski 'sex' ki maalumat aur tajarba 'sifar bata sifar' tha. Meri har baat per woh hairat se chat pe likhti: "Oh mera khuda! aesa bhi hota hai"!

(later I learned - it is called cyber sex in modern world - kind of funny term)

Phir agle 2 dinoN main ye 'chat' kai hadain aboor ker gai! - aur phir aik din - in the heat of erotic conversation - she almost get naked in front of cam!

Aur phir aik dam se chat aur cam off ho gaya!

Dusre din usne phone bhi nahi uthaya - aur phir uska woh phone bhi disconnect ho gaya - aur email account cancel ho gaya!

Is baat ko do mahine guzar gaye - meri saalgirah ke din mujeh Lubna ka birthday card mila. Card main usual wishes ke saath - aik chota sa letter tha. Bari nafees writing main likha tha:

"Aurat bari bewaqoof hoti hai. Woh saari zindagi 'attention' aur 'acknowledgment' chahti hai.
Jo pehla mard use ye dene main kamyab ho jaaye, uske liye woh apne kapre bhi utar deti thi.
 - I am not proud of what I did, but I have no regret either! Happy Birthday".

Lubna ki ye baat main kabhi nahi bhulunga!

Gay and Lesbian Love!

'Gay aur Lesbains' ki hame samjh nahi aa sakti, kiunke hum un jese nahi. Mere liye ye baat hamesha aik mu'amma hi rahi.

Jo kahani likhne ja raha hun, woh mere liye aik film ki tarah hai. Main sirf aik 'viewer' tha.

Chicago main second year ki residency main roommates se tang aa ker main ne apna alag studio le liya. Mere peeche wali building main 2 apartments the. Aik main aik young ABCD Pakistani larka/larki couple (call them A and B) rehta tha. Dusre main larki ka cousin apne roommate ke saath rehta tha (call them X and Y).

Larka/Larki ka couple bhi ajeeb tha. Sarak pe khare ho ker bos-o-kinar kerte. Har sham bahoN  main bahaiN daale walk kerte.  Couple aik dusre se jitna piyar kerte the, saath ke dono 'boys' (X n Y) itna hi larte rehte the. Main un dono larkoN ko aksar bus stop ya neeche store pe larte dekhta. Aik larka guitar bajata tha. Dusre ka mujhe ilm nahi.

Main FOB tha. ABCDs ki mujhe samajh nahi aati thi.  Meri shuru main unse 'Hi Hello' bas rasmi si thi magar phir kuch kuch dosti ho chali thi.

Mere apartment ki peechli khirki un ABCDs ki peechli khirki ke saamne khulti thi. woh aik floor neeche rehte the. Buildings ke beech choti si back alley thi. Couple (A and B) ki khirki hamesah khuli rehti. Unko privacy se koi sarokaar na tha. Magar dono larkoN (X and Y) ki khirki hamesha band rehti. 

Aik din main hospital se wapas aaya to larki TV pe kuch dekh rahi thi. Woh topless thi aur apne nipples se play ker rahi thi (I assume she was watching porn). Chicago ki sardiaN thi. Andhera ho chala tha. Main ne apne apartments ki lights off ki aur 'show' dekhne laga. Itne main larki ka boyfriend/Husband (Mr. B) aa gaya. ... I watched their live lovemaking.

Mere liye ye sab abnormal tha - magar unke liye normal tha!

Kuch dinoN baad unko kahiN se pata laga, main Pakistan ja raha hun. Larki ne mujh se kaha, meri aik dost ki shadi hai. Tum uski Diamond ki ring Pakistan se la sako ge? Main ne kaha le aaun ga. 

[Main Rebecca (here) ke liye larkioN wala saman laane hi wala tha.]

Main Pakistan se wapas aaya to pata laga larki ke bhai (Mr. X) ne 'suicide attempt' kiya hai - aur hospital main hai. .. Tab mujhe pata laga woh larka aur uska roomate Gay the - aur laraii bhi isi baat pe hoti thi ke us ka lover/roommate kisi aur larke ke ishq main girafter tha.

Aur main jis larki ke liye anghuti laya tha - uski engagement bhi aik larki se honi thi - jab mujhe 'izharre tashakkur', choti si ceremony main invite kiya gaya. Meri laai hui anghuti larki ne larki ko pehnaii. Wahan bohat se gay aur lesbian larke larkian the.

Mere liye ye sab kuch bohat naya tha. Main us raat apne bed pe leta sochta raha - ye kese rishte hain - jo unke liye bikul normal hain - aur hamare liye bilkul abnormal? Ye saare ke saare larke larkiyan achhe aur khubsurat inssan the  - phir ye kiun?

I came to conclusion - I would never be able to explain this - I just need to accept them and treat them like other humans.

On 'Organized Religions'

One miracle which 'Organized Religions' like Buddhism, Judaism, Christianity, Islam etc. hold against any other political or mass movement in known human memory is their persistence to survive and thrive!

It may be to the notion that believe in super being is a psychological need of every human but despite that 'organised religions' stood well against many other such phenomenons like magics, Vodoo etc. etc.

The way Islam spread within short period of 23 years from a tiny nowhere place or Buddhism came from one person or Christianity erupted from one event of crucifiction  is mind boggling and in a way speak of truthfulness itself.

Dua!

(At Saint Joseph's Oratory of Mount Royal, Montreal)

"Kiya ye baat sach ho gi ke is church ki seerhioN pe ghutoN ke bal chal ker jaao to har Dua qabool hoti hai?"

"Ye to maloom nahi ke Dua qabool hoti hai ya nahi - magar Dua maangne wale ko ye yaqeen zaroor ho jaata hai ke - main ne apne 'loved one' ke liye woh sab kuch kiya jo mere bas main tha"!

An encounter with one Sufi (Zafar Sahab)

(I am posting following as an event of life. I never took things very seriously as described to me here. But I should attest that many things predicted here came true in my life. Whenever I had any good success in worldly affairs/profession - I recalled Zafar Sahab. Sorry for little lengthy post.)



Ab tak ye sab ya to qisse khanioN main parha tha ya buzurgoN ki zabani suna tha. 

Zafar sahab se meri mulaqat Karachi main hui. Woh cousin ki dukan pe koi cheez lene aaye the. Unke haat main Fareedudin Attar ki 'Mantiq-ut-Tayr' (The Conference of the Birds) thi. Main ne shoq zahir kiya to bole: "Rakh lo mian! Shayed tumhare liye hi bheji gai hai!"

UnhoN ne bataya, unke gareeb khane pe har jumeraat mehfil hoti hai. Main kabhi kabhi wahan jaane laga. WahiN unke sufiana silsile ke kuch logoN se mulaqat hui. 

Main duniya bhar ka 'jhap jhaliya' sirf 'curious' tha! Mujhe Allah se wisal ki na kabhi aarzoo hui aur na walion ke qissoN ne mujhe kabhi mashoor kiya! 

Zafar sahab - saaf suthri wazaa ke aadmi thi. British civil service ka asar tha is liye angrezi ziyada bolte the! Kahin se andaza nai hota tha ke sufism ke raaste ke musafir hain. UnhoN ne kai baar chaha ke unke aastane pe 'regular' ho jaun - magar mujhe to Allah aur rasool ki zaat pe bhi shaq tha is liye dur rehta!

Phir main America aa gaya - unse taaluq kam ho gaya! Bohat baras beet gaye.

4 baras pehle Pakistan gaya to socha Zafar sahab se mil aaun. Bohat piyar se mile. Ye woh zamana tha jab gherulu halat aur bachhe ki pareshani se dimag ma'uf tha. Milte hi bole: "Hum na bulate to tum to kabhi is des na aate! Aao bahir sarak pe walk kerte hain". Mere bataye bagair kehne lage: ".Tumhari pareshani baja hai. Dekho! ye dukh sukh, ameeri gareebi, beemari sahet - sab dhoop chaun hai! Achha waqt bhi guzar jaata hai aur bura bhi. Rab ne tumhari ungli pakar rakhi hai, us pe bharosa kerna sikho".

Phir sufism pe baat hone lagi. Bole: "Tum bohat confuse lagte ho. Tumhara dimag Allah ko manta hai, magar dil ragib nahi hota. Tum Mirza Galib ki tarah 'la-ilaha' aur 'illal-lah' ke beech main muall'aq ho. Kaaba-o-kaleesa ki zad main ho."

Main ne poocha: "Kiya sufism Allah tak jaane ka short cut hai?"
Hasne lage, bole: "Allah tak jaane ka short cut to nahi - magar sab se ziyada 'comforting way' zaroor hai"

Main ne poocha: "Kiya sufi banne se aadmi maujize kerne lagta hai? Jese Hazrat Essa murdon ko zinda kerte the. Kiya insaan Hazrat Shams ki tarah paani pe chalne lagta hai"?

UnhoN ne jawab diya:  "Maujize kerne ki taqat behkawa, khilona aur rukawat hai. Us ke 'display' ki ijazat sirf khas halat main hai. Kai sufi, yogi aur achhe achhe Allah wale, is manzil pe aa ke ya to 'dabba pir' ban jaate hain, ya sab kuch ganwa dete hain."

Phir kafi der hum chup chap walk kerte rahe. Phir bole: "Main ne apne 'mursheed' se ijazat le li hai. Kiya tum koi maujiza dekh lo ge to aik baar koshish karo ge? Tum isi raaste ke aadmi ho. Bus therao ki kefiyat main ho." Main ne kaha waada raha. 

Woh kafi der mujhe dekhte rahe phir bole: "Is sarak pe jis jis gaari pe nazar daalo ge uska darwaza khul jaaye ga". Main aik ke baad aik 'car'  pe nazar daalta - aur uska darwaza aese khul jaata jese kisi ne bethne ke liye open kiya ho! Ye bhi aik ajab aalam tha. Mera dil bhara huwa tha aur aankhe laal thi. Hum chalte jaate aur gariaN khulti jaati. 

Kuch der baad sab kuch normal ho gaya. Meri zaban se sirf nikla: "WOW" 

(was it just an illusion like David Copperfield show?)

Main ne jab chalne ki i.jazat maangi to bole: "Ab ke wapas jao ge to tumhare naseeb main bohat kuch likha hai. Duniya bhi Deen bhi.  Jis cheez ki aarzoo kero ge saamne aa khari hogi. Magar aik baar Allah ke raaste ka muasafir ban ke dekho. Bohat aage jaao ge. Hazrat Owais Qarni tumhare mursheed-o-hadi hain. Tum se bohat piyar kerte hain."

Main ne sir hila diya (Yaqeen tab bhi nahi aaya)

Kuch arsa pehle Zafar sahab Karachi main faut  ho gaye - magar meri manzil abhi Josh Maleehabadi ke maslak se aage nahi gai!